What does a girl do when she’s been bumped until spring? Blog about it of course!
I’m not going to lie… I’m dying to start. Maybe I’m crazy to be anxious to stop eating for 3 months… But I am. I can’t wait, the waiting is driving me up the wall… I’ve never been good at waiting. Tim Petty said it best “The waiting is the hardest part”.
Every day life gets a little bit harder… My ankles have been shot since last Thursday’s clean-a-thon … Every step I take hurts, every single freaking one. And my shower isn’t done, which means I have to risk falling down the stairs in order to shower… To say I’m frustrated/scared/ and in pain would be an understatement. I’m not sure how much longer I can “keep on trucking” when everything hurts so much.
I’ll keep trying, and I am doing my best to be OK… But eventually I won’t be able to keep on going. I can’t support my own body…. My hips, knees lower back and ankles are all straining to keep me going forward. I don’t know how much longer I can go before I need a cane… That is a thing I DON’T want to happen. 29 and walking with a cane? Please God no! And yet… How much longer must I wait for relief.
So yes I’ve been bumped.. I now start my program maybe at some point in the spring. Not knowing, not having a deadline or a countdown to keep me motivated is bringing me down.
I’m doing my best though… Everyday I fight to make better choices, I walk even when I can’t breathe and I’m in pain, I keep going .
Hopefully I hear from the hospital soon and get this show on the road. I’m ready to shed the poundage and be AWWWWESOME!!!