A candid blog about my journey to a Happier, Healthier ME
So by now, we all know I have anxiety issues… What you may not know, is one of my BIGGEST issues, triggers, whatever you call it.. Is being even remotely active in front of or around people.. The thought of this terrifies me for many reasons, but probably the primary reason is that I sweat… …
So… tonight was a hard night for me food wise…. namely because I wanted to eat ALL THE THINGS, and my brain said slow your roll girl you can’t eat EVERYTHING, that is crazy… meanwhile my stomach said SHUT UUUUUUP…. I managed to avoid bingeing.. but I did overeat… is that the same thing? Err… …
I know, that one day I will be OK. That is actually terrifying to me. Real talk? I have been broken for as long as I can remember, it is a HUGE part of who I am, I’ve built a life around managing my symptoms and finding ways to get by…. So who the hell …
So life is a little crazy at the mo’ and as a result this post is way late in the posting… BUT it’s been for the best reasons ever! Little V and Monkey are both 1 (well almost.. Monkey man’s bday bash is this Sat) I’ve got some serious ants in my pants cause I …
I have my final Eval with the RO on Wed… and my anxiety has been slowly increasing each day LOL I really wish they could have just done it all in one shot, or at least not had a long wait between dates..maybe it’s to try and stress me out so they can see how …
Oh yeah, I’m going there… my scale.. is a JERK man. OK OK I know that muscle weighs more than fat… and I also know that as a woman I can fluctuate about 10 lbs just from water retention.. But still…. been doing SO good lately, fighting the urges to binge, doing my best to …
I recently had phase 1 of an evaluation at the Royal Ottawa. Phase 2 comes in August…. From there, who knows where I’ll end up or what course of treatment my doc will think is best… right now I don’t even know what I have for certain. Here’s what I know: I know that just …
Sounds weird… but sometimes I can’t tell. The urge to eat is so strong I have physical reactions that feel like hunger… Currently I just ate supper… I ate it 30 mins ago and it was a rather large portion… so why am I still hungry? *Insert lots of swear words and foot stomping*… *sigh* …
So we all know I’m fat… or Phat… either way I am not a tiny person. In the past this blog has primarily been about showcasing my road to “thindome”, but you know what… I don’t think I will ever get there, and that’s OK. Here’s why. I’ve come to realize that the size of …
Hello again! Over the past week, I have been repeating a mantra to myself as often as I’ve needed it (…. Sooooooooo it pretty much runs on loop in the background of my mind 24/7 lol).. I tweaked it from the last blog post.. it is now : I deserve to be happy, I deserve …