Tag «Fear»

Healthy Food Block…

Hey Folks! Ok… quick note.. I DO have a post-wedding recap coming, but want to wait until our professional pictures are in, and all the guests pics are in, so I can add some to the post.. but it IS coming, I swear… Hell, I’ll even pinky promise! I just didn’t want to annoy people …

Pre-Wedding Anxiety

Let me start this by saying, I am not having anxiety about my marriage… I am having anxiety about my wedding. That is a very strong and clear distinction I feel is necessary to state right off the bat. I love M, he is the ONLY person that I have ever felt this way about. …

Panic and Pictures

Mike and I had our engagement shoot a few weeks back, and though in hindsight I’m learning to see the good, in the moment, it was pure hell. Not because our photographer was bad, she is AMAZING, and not because it was horrible weather, it was a bit nippy, but that meant no sweating so …

Binge Eating and Me

Full disclosure? I am afraid of tomorrow, scared of what will happen, of what I am about to face, of admitting things I haven’t even had the guts to write on here yet. This is even more scary than me admitting and going through the process of a mental health exam at the Royal Ottawa. …

PANIC and there is no disco

I recently had phase 1 of an evaluation at the Royal Ottawa. Phase 2 comes in August…. From there, who knows where I’ll end up or what course of treatment my doc will think is best… right now I don’t even know what I have for certain. Here’s what I know: I know that just …

I might be sort of married-ish?

OK… for those who know me in real life, this past weekend my love and I had a very early pre-wedding run through / engagement party / engagement photo shoot… Not everyone will understand the WHY behind what we did, or why we chose to do things the way we did… and not all of …

Stress Eating

Lately, I have been under a lot of stress, and as a result, I’ve been constantly hungry and grazing or nibbling, or all out just snacking / eating… whatever…. The end result is that I haven’t lost any weight (obviously) and in fact I have gained. To say that I am mad at myself would …

My struggle

There’s no use in my wishing I had a normal brain… I don’t. After this most recent episode, I think it’s about time I stop pretending that I can just go off my meds and be OK. I felt fine because I was ON my meds…. Sometimes I’m an idiot. For the past few weeks …

Trying to be normal

Normal is such a strange word… What exactly does it mean to be “normal”. For the most part, I find normality boring and something to avoid. I like being quirky and unique. I enjoy being able to embrace the parts of me that don’t necessarily conform to standard society. Being normal is boring… But when …