Tag «Fear»

The day my brain broke

So, if you have me on FB… or follow this blog.. you may have noticed some anxiety filled posts and/or frantic emails/texts asking for hugs… My brain kind of… well broke this week. I’d like to follow that statement by adding in, I knew even while it was happening that it was just a stumbling …

Food Fail

I need to eat… Intellectually I know that I need to eat. My stomach is hungry… and it has been too long since my last meal.. I need to put food into my mouth. Tomorrow is weigh in… a day I used to look forward to, now scares me. That scale… hasn’t been a friend …

Food is Hard

You know what was easy? 4 shakes a day… that shizz was easy compared to what I’m doing now. Food is hard man. Maybe it’s harder for me because of the binge eating disorder hanging over my head every moment of the day waiting for the opportunity to have me slip off the wagon… or …

1 meal a day and I’m OK

For those who know me…. and any strangers there may be floating around I haven’t met yet… if you’ve followed my blog you know that I am recovering from Binge Eating Disorder. As a result my transition to food, is extra scary. By Goddess after 3 months of not having a sample of anything but …

Will I break 300?

Good Morning Interwebz…. OK so it’s not morning at all.. but rather afternoon… Anyway Hi! This week I will begin my transition to food! To say I’m excited would be an understatement. I am SO ready to have something other than a chocolate shake in me lol. These past 12 weeks have been a test …

Half of a Hundred makes 50 lbs GONE!

Words can not explain the joy that coursed through my body when I got on that scale yesterday and saw that number. 50…. 5 and a 0…. That’s how much weight I’ve lost. Can’t you freaking believe that?!?!?!?! Looking back, I don’t even feel like the same person at all! I am falling in love …

Fourty One and OH does it feel GOOD

I have lost 41 lbs… I have lost DOUBLE of that big guy on the bottom there….. DOUBLE! Can you believe that? I certainly can, because holy hell I feel AMAZING! I’m not going to lie and say it’s all been sunshine and roses.. you’ve read my blog, obviously it hasn’t. I still do get …

Day six

So tomorrow is officially my first full week on program. I have to say that I really am enjoying the shakes… it’s like a constant dessert party in my mouth. With that said though. I miss food… like so much. I miss chewing things. I miss the flavor explosion of nachos and the feeling of …

I dream of Cheese Curds

If you haven’t guessed by now… I am addicted to food. Not so badly that I gorge myself on food 24/7 until I’m puking… but put me into an emotional position, and it’s my source of comfort. You see, I don’t have any other vices… at all. I don’t drink, or smoke, and I certainly …